We are all selfish to a degree.  We want what gives us pleasure and makes us happy.  However, every action we take has consequences.

The main thrust of my message on this site is about living life to the fullest.  I encourage regular people to pursue what they really want in life.  However, I also emphasize that this must be balanced against one’s conscience.

It is easy to be lured into thinking the grass is always greener on the other side or that others have life so much better than we do.  Some examples include our financial status, whether we are married or not, the amount of free time we have,  where we live, our role at work, the vacations we take and our collection of stuff.

Regardless of our circumstance, it can be tempting to shirk our responsibilities, rationalize our actions and chase after the pleasure of what we want without listening to our conscience.  Of course, this never really works out.  It may provide some short-term satisfaction, but in the end it will leave us feeling guilty, empty and depressed.  It is counterproductive to living life to the fullest.

Our best life is one that is principled, disciplined and guided by a well-honed conscience.

Understanding the Value of Our Conscience

There is only one duty, only one safe course, and that is to try to be right.
~ Winston Churchill

In order to know what it means to seek pleasure without conscience, we first need to try to understand what our conscience is all about.

The conscience is like our onboard navigation system.  It guides us through life trying to keep us from doing things that might harm us or others.  It is our sense of right and wrong.

A big component of a healthy conscience is empathy.  Empathy is basically the capacity to put yourself into another’s shoes.  It is the ability to understand someone else’s feelings and point of view.

Another component of conscience is guilt.  Guilt is sort of like fear.  We typically think of it negatively, but it has a good purpose.  It helps to keep us out of trouble by warning us of potential consequences.

Pleasure Without Conscience Does Not Equal a Better Life

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure, till you know there is no hook beneath it.
~ Thomas Jefferson

Our desire for pleasure must be bounded by our conscience.  We have to weigh the potential effects of our actions on others before we engage.  We must look before we leap.

Going after what you want without any regard to how it will impact those around you that depend on you and love you is definitely not my definition of living life to its fullest.

People get this wrong in a number of ways.  Here are a few of the common situations where people ignore their conscience and get into trouble:

• Engaging in extra-marital affairs.
• Spending their way into overwhelming debt.
• Gambling away their life-savings (in casinos or in business).
• Running away from their family (physically or emotionally).
• Numbing their inner pain with drugs or alcohol.
• Failing to put their best foot forward at work.
• Becoming a workaholic.
• Checking out on the couch every night to watch sports.
• Falling into a fantasy life via porn sites.

You’ll notice that some of the things on this list we consider more extreme than others, but all of these items are wrong.  Deep down inside our conscience tells us so.  We should listen to it.

We must let our conscience guide us toward a truly fulfilling life.  There are no shortcuts!  We must bridle our desire for pleasure and do the hard work to build a great life one stone at a time.

3 Ways to Keep Yourself on Track

A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.
~ Mohandas Ghandi

Changing your life means changing your thoughts.  I’ve written before about elevating your thoughts to elevate your life.  As Ghandi and others have pointed out very clearly, we really do become what we think about. 

Therefore, if you’ve been chasing pleasure without listening to your conscience or if you want to avoid doing so, here’s what I would recommend.

1.  Practice Gratitude

We often seek shortcuts to pleasure when we think things are hopeless.  However, our situations are rarely as dark and desperate as we build them up to be in our minds.  We all have things to be thankful for in our lives.  We just aren’t in the habit of recognizing them. 

Set an appointment with yourself to spend just 15 minutes every morning making a list of things you have to be grateful for in your life.  Acknowledge the positive characteristics of your spouse, your boss and your kids.  Count up how fortunate you are for what you do have.  List all the so-called little things that you take for granted.  Add as many things as possible to the list.

This is an incredibly powerful exercise.  It may be a little difficult at first, but don’t give up.  Your list will start to grow longer every day as you tune yourself into to all you have to be grateful for in your life.

2.  Practice Humility

I think that in order to properly empathize with others that we first have to put ourselves in the proper light.  We often become self-absorbed.  The best way I’ve found to overcome this is to practice humility.

Being humble is simply having modesty.  It is recognizing that we aren’t the center of the universe.  Yes, we deserve certain things, but so do others.  What do they want and need from us?  How do they depend on us to do the right thing?

There are two places that I find myself humbled.  The first is in nature and the second is at church.  I’d encourage you to spend some time in both.  It will help you to let go of some of your selfishness and to recognize that you and your problems aren’t as large as you think.

3.  Practice Long-term Thinking

The final suggestion I would make is to practice long-term thinking.  I have explained the benefits and made a lot of suggestions on how to do this in Long-term Thinking Is Your Greatest Tool For Success.  I’d encourage you to read it, but I’ll share some thoughts about it here too.

Basically, we need to decide what we want most out of life and then ask ourselves if the action we are about to take is really going to get us closer to what we truly want.  We have to be able to listen to our conscience and objectively answer this question.  All too often, regular people are willing to rationalize our behavior or hope against overwhelming odds that we will get away with taking a big chance that rarely pays off in the long run.

Risks are a part of life, but don’t bet on the ones that fail.  Pleasure is tempting.  However, getting what we want right now is often detrimental to getting what we really want down the road just a bit.  Long-term thinking really is your greatest tool for success and living life to the fullest.

Listen to Your Conscience and Enjoy a Great Life

Character is much easier kept than recovered. 
~Thomas Paine

It is often difficult to undo big mistakes in life.  Seeking pleasure without conscience will certainly produce unwanted consequences some of which can last a lifetime.  There are examples of this all the time in the news.  Listen to your conscience and let it guide you.  Practice gratitude, humility and long-term thinking and you’ll be well on your way to a really great life!

 Photo by Richard0

Our motivation and character has a lot to do with the results we get in life.  It is easy to let good things go terribly wrong if we aren’t working from a solid foundation.

It is all about how you apply yourself toward a good cause that makes the difference.  There are some critical elements that you need to embrace if you want life to go well.

How Good Things Go Terribly Wrong

The list below contains seven good things.  However, without the proper direction, these things really can go terribly wrong.

1.  Wealth Without Work

An abundance of money is a good thing.  It enables us to provide for our families and give to others.  However, when money is gained without work, things often go very wrong.  This phenomenon is explored in Fortune’s Fools: Why the Rich Go Broke.

Two examples that come to my mind are lottery winners and people like Paris Hilton.  Neither worked for their money and therefore they don’t really appreciate its value and what it affords them.  It goes wasted on frivolous things and wild living.  Wealth hurts instead of helps in these lives.

2.  Pleasure Without Conscience

Pleasure is certainly a good thing.  We all want to engage in activities that bring us joy, satisfaction and delight.  Pleasure is the fruit of our labor.  It is our harvest for a job well done.  There is nothing wrong with seeking to enjoy one’s life.

The trouble comes when we pursue pleasure without conscience.  Conscience is the inner compass that guides us to conduct ourselves in a moral and ethical way.  Pleasure pursued without conscience hurts those around us.  It leaves a trail of tears in our wake.

3.  Knowledge Without Character

Knowing is good.  With knowledge, we can help people.  Knowledge of the truth enables us to do the right thing.  Knowledge of a skill allows us to work for the benefit of ourselves and others.  Knowledge opens the door to new discoveries.

Knowledge that is unguided by strong moral character is often used to hurt people.  Secrets are revealed that destroy lives.  Facts are distorted and used to mislead.  Fear is stirred unnecessarily.  Knowledge without character is a dangerous weapon.

4.  Science Without Humanity

Scientific discoveries are certainly good things.  As an example, they lead to medical breakthroughs that not only save peoples’ lives, but also make living more enjoyable.  I firmly believe in the value of good science.

However, science that isn’t guided by benevolence is dangerous.  It is misapplied to harm people instead of helping them.  For instance, companies have used scientific discoveries to invent things that lead to atrocities against whole populations.  This is science gone terribly wrong.

5.  Commerce Without Morality

Commerce or business is good.  It provides jobs so people can earn a living to provide for their families.  It makes products and services widely available so they are accessible to us all.  It fuels the research that opens doors to better living.

Unfortunately, we have all seen what happens when commerce is not guided by morality.  When people are unscrupulous in business, it can cost people their life savings.  A great example of this is the whole Ponzi scheme ran by Bernie Madoff.  Another example is the collapse of Enron.  Greed and a complete lack of integrity brought ruin.  A good dose of morality early on might have saved a lot of people a ton of grief.

6.  Worship Without Sacrifice

Worship is the act of paying adoring reverence or regard to something or someone.  Properly aimed worship that expresses humility and awe helps us to remain human.  It keeps us grounded and guards us from becoming too self-important.

Worship without sacrifice is empty.  In my mind, it is the epitome of hypocrisy.  It can lead others off the same cliff.  Worship by its nature demands that we bow our hearts and give up some of our own desires in honor of that in which we worship.

7.  Politics Without Principle

Politics is the art of government especially in a democracy.  It is the competition that filters who rises to power and what laws get enacted.  This is good.  Better solutions result from the debate and give-and-take that politics demands.

Of course, just as with all the other good things mentioned above, politics must be led by moral and ethical principles to produce good results.  Corrupt governments and officials hurt their countries.  They rob from their constituents and often cause issues for years.  A politician must operate on good principles to truly be effective.

The Way to Keep Good Things From Going Wrong

Good things are only beneficial when they are guided by morals, principles, ethics and conscience.  In other words, it is a person’s heart that determines the outcome of an endeavor.  If your heart is in the right place, then the results usually bear that out.

In what other ways have you seen good things go terribly wrong?

Photo Credit: King of Forwards