Is today going to be a good day for you?

We all have good days and bad days.  The good days RAWWWKKK and the bad days suck.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could control how today will turn out?

This begs the question, what determines which way this day will go?  Is it pure chance?  Is it a combination of things?  What exactly is involved?

These are some interesting questions to ponder.  I’ve been wondering about it a lot lately.  After all, I’d like to avoid as many bad days as possible.  Wouldn’t you?

I mean it only makes sense.  If you have a choice, wouldn’t you choose to make today a good day?  I definitely would.  Let’s look at this and see what can be done.

The Good Day vs. Bad Day Dilemma

A dilemma is a situation where a difficult choice has to be made between two or more alternatives.  Please notice the emphasis on the difficulty involved in this choice.

Every day has the potential to be either good or bad.  So, how do you decide which bucket to put today in?  It is normally based on what happens, right?  If good things happen to you like you get promoted or you close a big deal or you get along especially well with your spouse today, you count it as good.

If bad things happen, like you have a flat tire on the way to work or your computer crashes losing your latest project or your client chews you out for something that was beyond your control, then you feel like you’ve had a bad day.

For the most part, you likely decide whether today is good or bad based on circumstances.  Circumstances that are often beyond your control.

Here’s where the dilemma comes into play.  You choose.  You decide.  You pick.  In your mind, you determine which way today is going.  It is no doubt a difficult choice, but it is definitely a choice.

Why would you choose today to be a bad day?  Bad days SUCK!

It is hard when circumstances don’t go as you desire to choose to have a good day anyway, but it is a choice that you can make.  In fact, it is the best choice you can make.  The only other alternative is to have a bad day and why in the world would you make that choice?

7 Strategies to Help You Make It a Good Day

As I’ve already said, I know the choice to have a good day is difficult sometimes.  When you are temporarily caught up in this dilemma and trying to decide which way to go, it is smart to have a few strategies available to help you make the right choice.

Here are seven quick strategies you can use to help yourself make it a good day when circumstances seem to be taking it in the other direction:

1.  Stop Rehashing It

When something “bad” happens, we tend to want to rehash it over and over again in our heads.  This will almost certainly ruin the whole day.  Instead, do something simple to comfort yourself, let it go and move on.  This will help you make today a good day.

2.  Do Something Fun

If you’re mad or frustrated, you need to find a way to release it.  You’ve got to get your mind off the bad thing(s) and lighten up your mood.  The best way I know to do this is to engage in something fun.  This has a really good chance of turning your day around.

3.  Listen to Your Favorite Music

Music has a powerful effect on our emotions.  You can leverage this to your advantage.  If your day feels challenging, then crank up your favorite songs and let them carry you to a better place.

4.  Go for a Walk in the Woods

This one is a two-fer really.  A brisk walk will make your body produce endorphins which naturally improve your mood and being out in nature is additionally relaxing.  This is a quick and easy way to make it a better day.

5.  Get Something Done

You always feel better when you accomplish something meaningful.  Therefore, if you are struggling to make it a good day, you can declutter and organize your area to improve your mood.  It will get your mind off the negative and make you feel a sense of achievement.

6.  Snuggle with Your Honey

If you need a quick pick-me-up, ask your honey for a hug.  There is nothing in this world that can turn your day around quicker than simply feeling loved and cared for.  This will remind you that your life is good and that the really important things in your life are okay.

7.  Get Some Help

You may need help overcoming whatever obstacles are challenging you or you may simply need help choosing to make this a good day.  Either way, asking a good friend for some support is a great way to get things headed back in the right direction.

Do Something to Make It a Good Day

The choice about whether today will be a good day or a bad one really is up to you.  If it seems to be going the wrong way, then use one or more of the strategies above to help yourself make the right choice.  Do your own intervention to save yourself from having a bad day.  Obviously, the list above is not all-inclusive, but it should stimulate your thinking in the right direction.  If you need more, then check out this list of 52 Ways to Change Your Mood.  I hope you have a good day!

Do you struggle with choosing to have a good day when circumstances are working against you?  How do you deal with it?  Leave a comment on this post and let me know.

Photo: Copyright PhotoXpress.com

Do you appreciate the good things about marriage?

It seems that in some circles today that marriage gets a bad rap.  Well, I’m here to tell you that there are a lot of good things about marriage.  I should know.  I’ve been happily married for almost 20 years.

I think it is easy to underappreciate the alliance formed when a man and a woman pledge their love for one another in holy matrimony.

Maybe we need a reminder of just how valuable and attractive marriage can be.

Here are 10 good things about marriage that might get easily overlooked:

1.  Someone to Come Home to Every Night

Like a lot of introverts, I like my alone time.  However, there is nothing better in this world than knowing that you have someone to come home to every night.  When you are married, you know that no matter what happened in your day that you have a loving spouse at home looking forward to the moment you walk in the door.  This is priceless.

2.  Someone to Build a Life With

What is the point of building a life if you don’t have a spouse on the inside to share it with?  For me, this is what makes it all worthwhile.  I can endure a lot as long as I know there is a purpose behind it.  My wife and the family we’ve created together are that purpose.  They give everything I do a sense of meaning and value.  This is a huge bonus that comes with being married.

3.  Someone to Always Be Your Best Friend

People come and go, but your spouse is always there.  My wife is definitely my best friend.  For over twenty years, we’ve done pretty much everything together.  Sure, we fight sometimes, but we always work it out and move on.  That’s what friendship and marriage is all about.  We’ve got each other’s backs.  We love the same things.  We support each other through thick and thin.  It’s nice being married to my best friend.

4.  Someone to Catch You When You Fall

Sooner or later, life is going to deal you something that you can’t handle on your own.  When this happens, it is sure comforting to know that your spouse will be there for you.  My wife was there for me when we lost our home in a tornado and when my employer unexpectedly shutdown the company.  Having another pair of shoulders to help bear these burdens was definitely a big benefit.

5.  Someone to Tell You the Truth

The truth is sometimes hard to hear.  However, there are some things, even unpleasant things, that we need to know.  Often a spouse is the only person with a big enough vested interest to tell us the unvarnished truth.  Come on, you know you’ve avoided telling a friend some hard-to-deliver info even though they needed to hear it.  This is where your spouse won’t let you down.

6.  Someone to Hug You When You Have a Bad Day

There is nothing else in the world that makes me feel better when I’ve had a bad day than getting a big hug from my wife.  Words just can’t console you like a set of loving arms can.  In addition to just being there, my wife truly cares and empathizes which is what makes her hugs really help.  Knowing another person cares deeply that you’re hurting is the best medicine around.

7.  Someone to Make You a Better Person

All too often, we like to hide in our comfort zones.  Having a spouse is like having a built-in solution to this problem.  My wife is always encouraging me to try new things and to explore new places.  She keeps me from getting too comfortable which keeps me from stagnating.  You need someone continually challenging you to improve and grow.

8.  Someone to Know Everything About You

You need someone that knows everything about you and still loves you anyway.  Spouses, over time, generally learn the good, the bad and the downright ugly about their mates.  I find it comforting to know that I’m still loved despite what all my wife knows about me.  You need at least one person that knows the real, authentic you.  The intimacy of marriage gives you this deep partnership automatically.

9.  Someone that Shares Your Point of View

Sometimes you need a sympathetic ear.  You want someone that can see things the same as you do.  Because a spouse knows your history and is involved on a daily basis in all your trials and triumphs, they are in a perfect position to be your closest ally.  They’ll stand next to you and see things in the same light.  It is nice to know you’ve always got a die-hard companion when you need one.

10.  Someone to Love You Just the Way You Are

A good spouse will tell you the hard truth about yourself and they’ll push you to grow, but in the end they’ll love you just as you are.  Acceptance is something we all want and need.  It is also difficult to find.  The world can be cold and unfeeling.  That’s why marriage is such a great thing.  It gives you that one other person whose love you can depend on.

What did I miss?  What are some more good things about marriage?  Leave a comment below and chime in.

Photo: Copyright PhotoXpress.com

What good have you done lately?

Doing good for others has some pretty nice benefits for you.

Performing simple acts of kindness and compassion will make your life more enjoyable, satisfying and complete.

If you want to live a truly great life, then perform sincere acts of kindness without expecting anything in return.  

Trust me, the benefits will come.  They just can’t be the primary reason for your actions.

Three Ways Doing Good Benefits You

“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.”  ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

This old world could use a few more people willing to help others when they need it most.  I think we all know that Emerson’s quote above is true, but maybe a little reminding of exactly how doing good will benefit you (even though this shouldn’t be the primary motivation) will serve as inspiration.

Here are three ways doing good will benefit you:

1.  What Goes Around Comes Around

As the quote above states, it is really impossible to help someone else without helping yourself.  When you do good, you feel good.  I’ve experienced this many times myself.  I don’t know exactly why, but I know that if I volunteer my time or perform some other good deed, I walk away with a deep sense of satisfaction and joy. 

Also, when you freely give to others, it is more likely that they will reciprocate when you need a favor or some help yourself.   It is just human nature.  When someone helps us, we feel indebted to that person.  Therefore, in a sense, when we help others, we are storing up in them goodwill toward us.  This is a nice side benefit.

2.  Gives You a Greater Sense of Self-Worth

When you help someone else in need, it gives you an increased sense of self-worth.  You learn that you can make a difference.  This is an important acknowledgement that can really make you feel good about yourself and your capabilities.  After all, if you can truly help someone, then you have a tremendous value to offer the world.  Of course, we all have something to offer so this works for everyone.

Hopefully, this increased feeling of self-worth will propel you to do even more good deeds.  As you do, you will begin a cycle of positive emotions and actions that will become a rich and rewarding life.

3.  Relieves Boredom and Promotes Gratitude

The best cure for feelings of boredom, stagnation and lack of fulfillment is to reach out and help another human being that is less fortunate than yourself.  In fact, this therapy is so effective that it will heal your symptoms overnight.  I challenge you to give this a try and see if I’m not right.

In addition, to serving as a remedy for boredom, doing good will also make you feel more grateful for what you have.  It makes you keenly aware of just how blessed you are to have all you do.  Practicing gratitude is a key contributor to real happiness.  Therefore, doing good makes you happy.

Doing Good Benefits You and Others

Bottom line, the beauty of doing good is that it helps others and you at the same time.  It is a true win-win.  You just can’t help others without helping yourself in the process.  If you want to make a big improvement in your life, then get out there and help someone else.  It isn’t hard to find an opportunity.  The world is full of needs that you can meet.  Go do some good today!

Join the 31 Days of Kindness Project

Need a little inspiration to help you get started with kindness? 

You can download a FREE copy of A Manifesto for Making Kindness a Daily Habit. 

This free guide was compiled by Alex over at The Bridge Maker as part of his 31 Days of Kindness Project that starts today.  In it, you will find 132 ideas from 29 talented bloggers for simple acts of kindness. 

Alex is challenging us to perform one kind act per day for the entire month of March.  I think this is a wonderful project and that is why I’m helping to promote it.  Ah-ha!  I’ve performed my one simple act of kindness for today by sharing Alex’s free manifesto with you. 

I hope you will download the guide and join in spreading kindess around the world.  Remember, it will benefit you and others too!

Have you experienced the benefits of doing good?  If so, share what you’ve learned by leaving a comment below.

Photo: Copyright PhotoXpress.com

Routines are patterns of behavior that we repeat often.  Most of us love our routines.  After all, humans are creatures of habit.

We all have them, but should we?  I see both sides and I’m interested in your opinion.  What do you think?  Are our routines good or bad?  Do they help or hinder us from living life to the fullest?

The Case For Our Routines

Some of the pros for having routines are as follows:

• They are comforting.
• They create a lifestyle.
• They are efficient.
• They help us avoid errors.
• They are trainable.
• They increase accuracy.
• They reduce the effort required.
• They become good habits.

When I think about routines in a positive light, I think about things like brushing your teeth.  It is a routine that I do every morning and evening.  My wife and I even started early on training our kids to make brushing their teeth a routine.  Hoping that it sticks for a lifetime.

The Case Against Our Routines

Some of the cons against having routines are as follows:

• They become ruts.
• They limit our creativity.
• They allow us to run on autopilot.
• They resist change even for the better.
• They lead us into a box.
• They keep us from seeing new opportunity.
• They become bad habits.
• They make life mundane.

When I think of routines in a negative light, I think of behaviors like going to the mall every weekend.  This leads to impulse spending which leads to living beyond your means.  I also think of staying at a job well past the point where you have reached a plateau in learning and advancement.  These types of routines drain us and rob us of a good life.

Weighing the Good and Bad of Routines

There are some of my thoughts.  What are your thoughts?  You can vote below:

[poll id="2"]

Okay, now that you’ve voted.  Please leave me a comment and let me know why you voted like you did.  I’m looking forward to seeing the results of this poll and reading your comments.  Thanks!

Photo by ianloic