A clear, well-defined life purpose brings everything into focus.  It clarifies and simplifies your life because it explicitly defines who you are and what you are about.

Over the last week, I have explained why having a purpose is so important and I provided the steps for defining a clear life purpose statement. 

Today, I’m going to share my own life purpose with you as an example so you can see the power in this.

The Four Values That Are the Bedrock of My Life Purpose

I explained previously that your life purpose should be based on the values that resonate the most with you.  You want to build your life on a solid foundation.

Here are the four values that are a part of my life purpose:

1.  Excellence

I consider excellence to be one of the seven key characteristics of living a Super-Charged Life.  Therefore, it only makes sense that it would be one of the values I consider most important, but what does it really mean?

Well, for me, some of the things that come to mind when I think of excellence are expertise, wisdom, high standards, attention-to-detail, continual improvement, and just generally being the best you can be in all aspects of life.

This is absolutely one of the values that ignites my passion.  I’ll admit that I’m hard on myself.  I’m my own worst critic because I want to be excellent in everything I do!

2.  Integrity

I want to have high moral standards.  I believe that to live the best life possible, other people have to be able to trust me.  Why?  Because I can’t do it alone!  Life takes relationships and trust is an essential component.

When I think about integrity, it conjures up words like honesty, faithfulness, commitment, authenticity, transparency, virtue, sincerity and candor.  Living a life of integrity means not doing anything in secret that I wouldn’t freely admit.

A man is only as good as his word.  I want to be a man that can be trusted and loved without worry.  Integrity is certainly one of my core values.

3.  Faith

I believe there is more to this life than what meets the eye.  Faith in God adds meaning and significance to my life.  It gives me a moral compass that keeps me on track and guides all my endeavors.  It reminds me that there is something bigger out there that is in control over all the chaos in this life.

Faith is a lifelong pursuit.  It encompasses things like hope, love, joy, peace, forgiveness, fellowship and principles.

Faith means believing in that which is unseen and unproven in human terms.  It is a leap.  It takes courage and it takes commitment.  I want to continually grow in my faith.

4.  Gratitude

Fostering gratitude is very important for maintaining a positive attitude and for being happy.  I have a lot to be thankful for in my life!  However, for whatever reason, I find it easy to forget all that I have.  Therefore, I want to focus on always cultivating gratitude.

Gratitude is comprised of thankfulness, appreciation, humility, offering praise and counting one’s undeserved blessings.  It is both an inward acknowledgement and an outward expression.

I have a lot of work to do in seeking to be more grateful.  I especially want to learn to express gratitude more freely and openly towards the people in my life.  I want to really emphasize gratitude so I included it in my life purpose.

Pulling My Purpose Together Into One Cohesive Statement

These four values are definitely the ones the are the foundation for my life purpose.  They inspire me!  They may do nothing for you, but I own them.  They are exactly the things that I want my life to be about.  Here’s how they come together in my life purpose.

I want to spend my life pursuing excellence, integrity, faith and gratitude.

This is my life purpose.  It is simple, yet profound.  It is broad, yet establishes boundaries.  It is bold, yet achievable.  My life purpose is worthy of my lifelong fidelity!

A Life Purpose Really Makes Sense

The purpose of life is a life of purpose.  ~Robert Byrne

I hope this helps you to see the value of clearly defining your life purpose.  I can’t say enough about the value of having it spelled out.  If you take the time to do this for yourself, you will be amazed at how good it feels!

What is your life purpose?

Photo by whossein

There is always room for improvement in our lives and James Allen knew exactly how to live life to the fullest.  Whatever it is you want from life, you will find that Allen can teach you how to achieve it. 

Here are some of the things from the book that stand out to me.

"A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts."

This is a humbling statement.  It forces us to take responsibility for our condition in life.  After all, we are responsible for what we think. 

Therefore, whatever we lack in character that holds us back from achieving the life we desire is our own fault.  It is our fault because we choose our thoughts that govern our actions.  Again, this is humbling because most of us haven’t achieved all that we want.  However, it is also encouraging because it reminds us we are in control.  There is hope!

Allen points out that there is a cause and effect relationship between what we think and the external condition of our life.  If we think the right thoughts, then we will eventually produce the results we desire.

"A man’s mind is likened to a garden, which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild; but whether cultivated or neglected, it must and will, bring forth."

I really like the mental picture this paints.  Creating the right thoughts is like taking care of a garden.  The soil will produce regardless of what we do.  Tended correctly, it will produce fruit.  Unmanaged, weeds will overrun the garden.  Our mind operates the same way.

So often, we expect to change our thoughts and habits immediately.  This is not the way it works.  You have to cultivate the right thoughts over a lifetime.  The sooner you begin, the bigger harvest you will reap. 

We don’t plant seeds and then expect to see fruit spring forth the next day.  In gardening, we know that it takes time and effort over a growing season before we are going to see any results.  We know that we will have to water, weed, and nurture the plants if we want them to survive. 

It is the same with our thoughts.  Right thinking doesn’t occur overnight.  It takes time to cultivate the right thoughts.  We shouldn’t give up or get frustrated with ourselves when we make mistakes.  Instead, we should learn from our mistakes, correct our thinking, and persistently continue pursuing the life we desire.

"Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are."

Look around yourself right now.  The circumstances of your life are a good indication of who you really are deep inside. 

This might not be 100% true because you may be passing through an unfortunate season of life right now, but if you look over the course of your life, the predominant  circumstances are an accurate reflection of your inner well-being. 

If there is an external effect in your life that you do not like, then look inward for the cause in your heart.  Your circumstances spring forth from the thoughts you cling to.  Letting go of the vice or weakness in your thinking will allow you to change the result you are getting.  You have to change your thinking to change your behavior.

Let me paraphrase an example from the book.  Let’s say a rich person is suffering from a painful disease because they eat too much and are overweight.  They are willing to pay for the best doctors and medicines available to help them lose weight.  However, they won’t stop eating unhealthy foods.  Such a person is unlikely to resolve their situation because they are unwilling to change their thinking on the one point necessary to truly improve their health.

We often cling to the very thoughts that are producing the results we wish to overcome.

"There can be no progress, no achievement without sacrifice, and a man’s worldly success will be in the measure that he sacrifices his confused animal thoughts, and fixes his mind on the development of his plans, and the strengthening of this resolution and self-reliance."

The only thing holding us back from our full potential in life is the weaknesses in our own thinking.  The more we work to correct our thinking, the better our life will become.

Allen didn’t believe that just by thinking about something or wishing for it that you would achieve it.  No, he was much more practical than that.  He knew that it would take sacrifice and planning.

You need a specific purpose to fix your thoughts upon.  Whatever it is in your life that you desire to achieve, set your mind on it.  Seek to learn as much truth about the subject of your desire as possible.  Lay out definite plans toward your goal.  Realize that no one is going to hand you what you want on a silver platter. 

You are going to have to train your mind and body by eliminating fear and doubt and by building yourself up in commitment and confidence.  You have to exercise self-control and determination to get what you want.

"He who would accomplish little must sacrifice little; he he would achieve much must sacrifice much; he who would attain highly much sacrifice greatly."

This is the final thought that I’ll leave with you.  Living a full and successful life really does come down to how much you want it. 

Success isn’t about fate or luck or circumstances.  It is about sacrifice, will, persistence, and determination.  It is about getting your thoughts and actions right in your life.  Remember, the thought that "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he", will change your life if you embrace it and live it!

Photo by ninjapoodles

We all like to believe that we judge people fairly.  It is obviously frowned upon in our society to think that a person is discriminated against based on external factors.  However, study after study seems to reiterate that we do make such judgements about people.  The first impressions we get of people are very strong and it is often difficult for us to change our minds. 

Whether we like to admit it or not, we usually draw a conclusion about a person from their looks.  This then affects how we treat that person.  This is obviously unfair and deserves our utmost attention to correct.  We have to be honest with ourselves about how we discriminate and make a conscious effort to correct this bad behavior.

External factors that we so easily use to judge people.

It is very easy to jump to conclusions about people based strictly on how they look.  We all do it even though we don’t like to admit it.  Here are some ways that we judge people that seem unfair.

1.  The color of a person’s skin.

It has been shown time and again that people favor others based on the color of their skin.  One study found that light skinned blacks were more likely to be described as intelligent, attractive, or wealthy while darker skinned blacks were often labeled as poor, criminal or tough/aggressive.  We often don’t even realize or acknowledge that we hold such biases.

2.  A person’s weight.

We’ve probably all heard or seen the stories about skinny actresses dressing up in fat suits and finding that people blow them off because they appear obese.  This test has been conducted many times.  There truly is a weight bias in America.  Overweight people are often seen as undisciplined, disorganized, and unattractive.  They are discriminated against when competing for jobs, made fun of on television, and rejected by the trendy.  Does a person’s weight really mean so much?

3.  The clothes on a person’s back.

I remember feeling pressure to wear the right thing in high school and although the discrimination is much more subtle now, I think it still exists.  Right or wrong, people judge you on the clothes you wear.  We jump to conclusions about a person’s success, professionalism and even talent based on their wardrobe.

4.  The age of a person.

America is growing older, but as a society we fail to respect our elders.  I don’t know if it is because we all are in denial of growing older or what, but those above a certain age are often treated as though they don’t have a brain.  Few people in the United States seem to give older folks credit for their wisdom and experience.  Instead, we judge them harshly and chuckle behind their backs about their failings.

5.  Whether a person is male or female.

It is true that in certain situations it pays to be one sex over the other.  There are jobs where biases against one sex clearly exist.  Women have long felt that men often get paid more to do the same work even at executive levels.  At a more practical level, my wife realizes that she judges people based on their sex.  She tells me she is more likely to open our front door if a visiting stranger is a woman versus a man.  How does this bias spill over into other areas of judgement?

Is it possible to stop judging people on external factors?

Clearly it is difficult to discern when our personal biases are impacting our judgement.  These biases are burned into our psyche at an early age.  Our minds tend to quickly jump to conclusions about people with little real evidence. 

However, discrimination of this type is not good for us.  It robs us of opportunities to build relationships with healthy, loving, intelligent people.  We have a choice and I believe it is possible for us to override these biases if we consciously choose to do so.  It takes effort, but this is what separates humans from other animals.  We can choose our behavior.  We do not have to react without choice to our tendencies.

A better list to use to judge people.

Rather than relying on false first impressions, it is better to suppress this urge and delve deeper into more accurate indicators of a person’s true worth.  Here is a better list of questions to consider when sizing up another person.

1.  Are they a person of integrity?

A person’s actions should match their words.  How do they act when they think no one is watching?  If they don’t do the right thing, then you may want to avoid getting involved in a relationship.  A person should be trustworthy.  They should have a proven track record of honesty, authenticity and openness.  They may look good on the outside, but if they lack integrity, then trouble is likely not far over the horizon.

2.  How do they treat others close to them?

A person should demonstrate they care about other people in their life.  You want to look at how they react when others are ill, in need, or have a problem.  This is a great time to get a glimpse into what kind of heart the person has.  Are they involved in anything bigger than themselves?  Do they make any kind of meaningful contribution to the world for which they volunteer or earn very little?  These kinds of actions will tell you something real about a person’s worth.

3.  Where have they applied their skill and talent?

Look at what a person has actually done with their life to get an idea of who they really are.  Where did they go to school?  What did they study?  What are they passionate about?  Engage them in a conversation on a topic they enjoy.  This will expose their intelligence.  Listen for their sense of humor and wit.  Find out what they consider their greatest accomplishment.  These things will reveal a lot about a person.

A person is more than their outsides reveal.

It takes more time and effort to really get to know a person before judging them.  I’m not sure if we can totally override our preconceptions, but I think we must try to quiet them while we delve deeper.  The color of a person’s skin shouldn’t matter nor should their age, sex, weight, or what clothes they wear.  There are many interesting, smart, and valuable people that don’t fit the mold that our society has created.  It is up to us to decide how we will judge people.

How do you judge people?

Photo by danorth1

This is a guest post by Brandt Smith.  Brandt is cofounder and senior editor of

“Character is doing the right thing when nobody’s looking.” ~J.C. Watts

“Do you have a minute?  We need to talk about Tim.” I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.  Something wasn’t right and this was definitely going to take more than a minute.

“Remember the shrinkage we’ve been battling? Tim was just caught walking out with several units.  It looks like he’s been selling them on the side for several months.”

Here’s the quandary

Tim was one of the top performers in the company.  He was hard working, good natured, and extremely good at his job.  As a result everyone loved him-especially his customers!

If I fire him we lose an employee who is a top performer.  His contribution to the company is significant and would be hard to replace.  He is close to his customers and I know we’ll lose business.

This goes beyond his sales skills.  Tim is well liked by just about everyone and if I fire him there will be an uproar.  I’ll have managers asking if I can make an exception.  His peers will be upset and their work will be disrupted.  His customers will ask why he was let go and there is a good chance they will take their business elsewhere.

If I make an exception and let it slide there will be repercussions as well.  He violated company policy, the law, and his integrity.  Remember, this wasn’t taking home some office supplies.  He is a role model and his lack of ethics could wear off on other employees. If I make an exception others will expect me to do the same for them.

What’s a guy to do?

7 keys to doing the right thing

1.  Know your core values
How can you do the right thing if you don’t know what it is?  You can’t rely on others to tell you.  You can’t always rely on the company to guide you-think Enron!

We develop our values over time.  It starts with our family, faith, and friends.  We can further develop it by reading inspirational material and meditation.  We make choices throughout our lives which shape who we are and what we believe.

Most of us know the difference between right and wrong. Black and white is easy, it’s the vast gray area in between that causes us so much trouble.  This is the area we need to explore.

2.  Take a clear look at the situation
Decisions need to be based on facts and reality.  Often there are emotions flaring and other people are pressuring you to go with the flow.  This interferes with your ability to make a rational decision.

Take a deep breath and give yourself some space.  Separate the pressure and emotion from the facts.

3.  Trust your gut
You know right from wrong.  What do you do when you are uncertain?  Listen to your conscience, that gut feeling that you can’t explain.  Often your subconscious mind sees minute details that escape your conscious (logical) mind.

4.  Do the right thing
It takes strength and courage.  This is what separates the men from the boys-or the women from the girls!  Doing the right thing is often hard.  Over time it becomes easier as you gain confidence.

Reputations are built over a lifetime of actions and decisions.  They are destroyed when we act contrary to our beliefs.  Decide what you want to be known for making sure it is congruent with your values and beliefs.

5.  Stick to your guns
People may try and get you to change your mind.  Remember, you make them uncomfortable when you have the courage to stand on your principles.  It reminds them of their own shortcomings.

Integrity is one of the key leadership traits.  If you are willing to go against the grain people may not like you but they will respect you.  They will take strength from your actions and do the same.

6.  Prepare for the consequences and expect resistance
Often doing the right thing has immediate consequences.  As uncomfortable as this is this will pass.  Having integrity is always more effective though it often takes a long term point of view to see this.

7.  Review your actions
Always take time to review the situation and learn from it.  Did you act in accordance with your beliefs?  How could you have dealt with the situation better?

This goes hand in hand with the first point.  By reviewing our actions and choices we learn more about our beliefs.  We start to understand what we value and what we are willing to sacrifice.

What about Tim?

Doing the right thing is about acting in accordance with your beliefs and values.  It is about character and integrity.  In Tim’s case this was a severe breach of trust that required serious consequences.  Anything less would not be in accordance with our values and would be a violation of our integrity.  In the end we let him go.

What would you have done?

Photo by Global Integrity

The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty.  ~Zig Ziglar

We must do the right thing in our life even when it’s not convenient for us.  This is called integrity.  Here are several ways that we can build trust and do the right thing.

1.  Do what you say you will do.

This seems simple enough, but how often have you experienced people doing the exact opposite?  As a customer, I have seen this numerous times.  I get told the work will be done tomorrow and then it is not.  We must set the right expectations with others and then live up to those expectations.  Make sure that your actions exactly meet your words.  If they do not, then people will not trust you.  Another way that people fail in this area is by not giving their employer a full eight hour workday.  You agreed to this when you took the job so do it.  We must be sure to do what we say we’ll do in every area of our lives.

2.  Work at an honest profession.

Do you firmly believe that what you do for a living is benefiting others?  If not, then I would suggest seeking other employment.  We can’t really get ahead and be happy in life if we aren’t doing something that we feel has meaning.  Does the company you work for conduct its affairs in an ethical manner?  Are you fair and consistent with your customers?  If not, these things can come back to bite you.  People will eventually discover these disparities and then your reputation will be tarnished.  Be sure you work at an honest profession.

3.  Meet your financial obligations as agreed.

Pay your bills!  I think most people know they should do this, but they often fail to manage their finances appropriately to avoid getting overextended.  Do you have a written budget?  Do you keep track of what you spend and manage your money so you can pay your bills on time?  Meeting your financial obligations is a key indicator of your trustworthiness.  I mentioned in Reality Check – Are You Doing What It Takes To Get Ahead in Life? that employers now run credit checks prior to hiring people.  This is one way they check to see if you can be trusted.  It would be terrible to miss out on the next great job offer simply because you didn’t pay your bills on time.

4.  Make sure your handshake is better than any contract.

If you made an agreement with someone verbally or otherwise always, always, always fulfill your end of the bargain.  You must do this even if it turns out not to be in your best interest.  If you give people a reason to doubt whether your word is good or not, then you will miss many great opportunities in life.  Your handshake on a deal should be better than any contract.  People must know without a doubt that you will not go back on your word.  This is crucial to your success!

5.  Show up on time to every appointment.

Sure, I’ve been late before, but it is the rare exception.  In my mind, if someone shows up late, it plants a seed of doubt about whether I can trust them with important things.  You need to be where you said you’d be when you said you’d be there.  Again, this is not difficult, but if you are consistently late, it sends the wrong message.  People will talk about you behind your back and they will not trust you.  Without trust, you will miss out on chances to improve your life.

6.  Be faithful to your spouse.

Don’t give anyone a reason to doubt you in this area.  Look at how failures in marital fidelity tarnished Bill Clinton’s reputation and the legacy of his Presidency.  What you do in your personal life will spill over into your professional life as well.  Maybe you don’t cheat, but do you flirt?  Don’t even create the perception that you might break your vows.  People want to do business with those that they know beyond a shadow of a doubt they can trust and that will project a positive image for their organization.

You must do the right thing to be trusted with greater opportunities.

Doing the right thing is really not that hard, but it is critical to balanced success.  The more consistently you do what is right, the more often doors will be open to you.  Being trustworthy, you will experience greater happiness and build more meaningful relationships.  These relationships will assist you to expand your influence and live a richer, more abundant life.

Photo by Andyrob

You are striving for knighthood.

Imagine for a moment that we live in the times of knights that wore shining armor and rode valiant, white steeds.  I am the king and you desire knighthood.  I like this already!  Knights were highly respected warriors.  Becoming a knight was greatly desired because it brought honor and recognition to your family name.  As a result, your family has been grooming you for knighthood since you very little.  They started out teaching you manners and courtesy at a very early age.  These are considered the most elementary and basic traits needed to ever hope to become a knight.  Now, you have grown into a strong and brave young man.  You come to the king and seek knighthood.  How will he evaluate your worthiness?  As king, he will want to know if you have demonstrated chivalry in all your actions.  But, what is chivalry really?  Let’s examine more closely each of the three ideals of chivalry so you will know exactly what the king is looking for in you.

Are you living a life of knightly virtues?

As men hopeful to become knights, it is our responsibility to lead by example.  The standard is very high!  What virtues is the king inquiring about when he wants to know if we live with knightly virtues?  He will inquire about things like courage, justice, temperance, generosity, and hope.  Are we disciplining ourselves and cultivating this kind of behavior in ourselves and those around us?  Men, the king wants to know if we have embraced the more manly virtues of knighthood.  He asks, “What have you done to show that you are brave in battle, loyal to your king and God, and willing to sacrifice yourself for the greater good?“  What would be your answer?  Is your life committed to a cause worth fighting for? 

He would go on to ask, “Do you stand up for what’s right no matter the cost, do you avoid excesses in eat and drink, have you contributed to the welfare of the kingdom’s widows and orphans?”  The king might bring in your friends, family members, and members of your community as witnesses.  What would they say about the way you live your life?  Would they have examples of your virtuous deeds to share with the king?  Once the king was satisfied that you live with knightly virtues he would move on to evaluate your honor.

Honor is critical to chivalry and knighthood.

The king knows that honor is about reputation.  It is about your integrity.  He would want to know if the important people in your life trust you.  Should they?  Trustworthiness comes from doing the right thing in every situation.  Trust is earned.  The king would want to know if your actions have earned you the trust and respect of your brother warriors.  He knows that a man is only as good as his word.  The king would also ask your business associates, “When he shook on deals, did he always, without exception, stand behind his agreement?”  He would want to know if your word is better than any legal contract.  What would these people say about you?

The king would go on to question your wife and family.  He knows that in order to become a knight and serve the kingdom well, that you must stand behind your promises.  He would ask your wife, “Has he been 100% faithful in action and attitude?”  The king knows the temptations that exist.  For example, he knows that conservative estimates are that 60% of men have extramarital affairs.  He would want to know if you stood behind your word in your wedding vows to forsake all others loving her in times of sickness and health, for richer or poorer, better or worse.  He would ask your kids, “Does your dad keep his promises?”  Are you there both physically and mentally when you promise to be?  Do you make time to play with them when you say you will?  The king would scrutinize the answers of everyone closely because he knows that honor and trustworthiness are critical to knighthood.  Once the king was satisfied that you have met this qualification for knighthood, he would go on to evaluate the final ideal of chivalry.

Every princess deserves courtly love from her chivalrous knight.

At this point, the king would be satisfied that you have met the basic requirements of your marriage, but now he would take it one step further.  The standards of knighthood are high and the king would want to know if you have demonstrated courtly love for your wife.  He would want to know if you treat your woman as a true princess.  He would assemble a court of your wife’s sisters, friends, and co-workers to help him evaluate you in this ideal.  The king would ask them about your romantic reputation with your wife.  He would want to know, “Does he still romance her like he did when they were courting?”  He would ask them for specific examples of your feats of romantic love.  He would want to know if you demonstrate to the world that she is your one and only?  He would ask the ladies, “Does she brag about his romantic feats?”  Do these other woman know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that you would risk your life defending your wife against the fiercest fire-breathing dragon in all the kingdom?  Would your love for your wife hold up to this level of scrutiny by the king?  If so, then you may be ready for knighthood!

You are hereby dubbed Sir Knight of Modern Chivalry.

We have high ideals to live up to in order to be dubbed modern knights.  It isn’t easy being a real man and living by the ideals of chivalry.  However, the benefits are well worth it.  If we choose this path, we will reap its rewards.  I hope you are up to the task.  Our families, businesses, and communities need some true knights.  We need men that pursue the ideals of chivalry with their whole hearts.  Ask your wife.  I bet she would love you to be her knight in shining armor!

Are you a candidate for knighthood?  If so, apply to the king by leaving a comment below!  Also, be sure to Stumble or Digg this article so other knights can find it.

Photos by DesignMinistry, Feuillu, xjyxjy and Kodak Agfa