Are you living where life is the most real and enjoyable?

The most powerful and valuable slice of life is the here and now.  It is this very moment.

The past is finished.  You cannot change it.  What’s done is done.  You should glean whatever lessons you can from your past, but otherwise let it be.

The future is an unknown quantity.  You can make choices to prepare for various eventualities, but in the end, you can’t control what happens next.

The only real option you have to live the best that life has to offer is to embrace the present moment for all it is worth.

How We Miss Out on Where Life Happens

Real life is happening all around you.  However, often it goes unnoticed.  We are too busy with so many other things.  While the present moment is passing us by:

• We bury ourselves in Facebook for hours on end.
• When we are at home, we are thinking about work.
• When we are at work, we are thinking about home.
• We become obsessed with meaningless agitations.
• We start feeling sorry for ourselves.
• We waste vast amounts of time “escaping” from reality.

What are you running from?  If you have problems, they won’t get any better until you face them.  Trying to avoid them only works for so long.  Eventually life catches up with you and you have to deal with it anyway so, why not just turn and face it now?

Once you’ve dealt with any outstanding issues, then you can really seize the moment.

How to Tune In to Where Life Happens

If you really want to drink deeply from all that life offers, then you’ve got to learn to fully absorb the moment you are in right now.  How do you do this?  Well, there are some techniques you can use to bring yourself back to reality.

If you can do just these three things, you’ll be well on your way to living where life happens:

1.  Become Hyper-Attentive

Your brain is so used to its current scattered way of thinking that it is necessary for you to retrain it.  You want to take steps to focus it like a laser on the present moment.  The best way to do this is to become hyper-attentive.  What do I mean by this?  Well, you start to really pay close attention to every single detail going on around you.  You notice the vividness of the colors, the pungentness of the aromas and the rawness of the emotions.  Of course, you’ve got to slow down to do this and you’ve got to be very intentional about it.  Glenn describes what hyper-attentiveness is like as he focuses on living in the moment.  Read his experience to learn more about how to practice this yourself.

2.  Take Time to Appreciate the Simple Pleasures

Typically, we are too distracted and worried to appreciate life’s simple pleasures.  We are in a rush to get to the next thing on our to-do list.  However, if you really want to experience where life happens, then you’ve got to start to gain a new level of recognition for these little moments that are truly priceless.  I’m talking about serendipitous little events that make life worth living.  If you aren’t sure what I mean, then see this list of simple pleasures for clarification.  You can’t manufacture these moments.  They have to occur naturally, but to get the most from life, you need to fully savor them when they appear.

3.  Stop All the Worrying

Corey puts this best when he admonishes us, “Don’t borrow trouble”.  When you hear of something bothersome and you start to worry that it could happen to you or your family, you are borrowing their trouble and making it your own.  This practice robs you of being able to enjoy the moment.  You become too wrapped up in worrying about what could be to see the enjoyable part of what is happening right this instant.  Focus on the positive and push the negative out of your consciousness.  If you are a worrywart, then this will take some practice before it becomes natural for you, but the effort is worth it.

Welcome Back to Real Living

You’ve been so used to living in the past or longing for the future, that being in the present will feel a little weird at first.  It will be somewhat foreign to you.  So, I want to welcome you back to living life where it really happens.  This is where you can find the most happiness and fulfillment.  This is where you can connect and love deeply.  This is where you want to be.  Practice the three techniques above and I’ll shout to you, “Welcome back!”

Have you been living where life happens?  What have you done to focus yourself on the present moment?  Share your experiences in the comments to help others on their path.

Photo: Copyright PhotoXpress.com

It is easy to just go through the motions hurrying through our day without drinking in all that life has to offer.  We miss so much this way.

I’ve always wanted to get the very most out of life and in a way it seems that rushing from one thing to the next is the answer, but I don’t think it is.

When you are constantly focused on the “next thing” you miss so much of what is right before you.  This moment is all that really exists for us.  Who knows what the future holds?  We need to find ways to slow down, focus ourselves and really enjoy the present.

The Importance of Mindfulness

We are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living.
~ Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace Is Every Step

Mindfulness to me is the art of being fully aware and living in the present moment.  It is an art because it is different for everyone and something that we strive for, but probably never really perfect.

As Thich Nhat Hanh points out in the quote above, we are often good at setting goals, planning, receiving feedback, adjusting strategy and continual improvement, but are we good at enjoying the fruits of our labor?

In our hurried world, it is easy to miss the victories, the beauty, the love, the peace and the joy of living.  We rush right past the moments that make life rich.  We fail to stop and smell the roses because we didn’t even notice there were any.

The Enemies of Mindfulness

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
~ Buddha

I don’t think we even realize how much of the time we aren’t really present in the moment before us.  We are too often caught up in other things to be fully mindful.

There are all kinds of things that rob us of our mindfulness.  A great example is our Blackberry or iPhone.  How many times a day do we check those things???  The next time you are in a public place, look around and see how many people are fiddling with their device.  They are certainly not mindful of what’s going on around them.  They are absorbed in a virtual world.

This kind of distraction robs us of so much of what life has to offer.  We fail to notice a beautiful scene.  We fail to meet someone new.  We fail to fully engage with our kids or spouse.  We fail to just enjoy a peaceful moment.

Another example that I think is less often considered is anger.  When we are angry, we are caught up in the past.  We are not mindful in the present moment.  Anger is prevalent in our society.  We are in a hurry and all kinds of things get in our way.  This frustrates us and makes us angry.  It also steals from us any joy that we might be able to experience in the present.

I challenge you to test yourself on mindfulness.  Do the following:

• Set a reminder on your phone so it will beep you once an hour
• When you hear the beep, ask yourself where your mind is at.  Are you calm, peaceful and fully present in the moment or thinking of something else? 

I know for me, that I’m usually off in another world mentally.  I’m thinking about the “next thing” or what I need to do tomorrow or how someone might react to the email I just sent or whatever.  The point is I’m not present in the moment where I’m at.  This detracts from living life to the fullest.

How to Become More Mindful

Every morning, when we wake up, we have twenty-four brand-new hours to live.  What a precious gift!
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

It is truly a struggle to keep yourself present, but with just a little awareness and intentional effort, we can become more mindful.  This will improve our day and our life.

I’ve been practicing a technique from Peace Is Every Step that is very useful.  It is called conscious breathing.  It is extremely easy, doesn’t cost anything and works amazingly well.

It is as simple as this:

• Pause whatever you are doing and become consciously aware of your breathing.
• When you breathe in say “In” and when you breathe out say “Out”.  You don’t even have to speak the words verbally, you can just say them in your head.
• Repeat this for 5 to 10 breaths.

Conscious breathing can be practiced anywhere and it really is an effective way to bring yourself back to the present.  It is also very calming.

You can use the conscious breathing technique along with the one-hour reminder you set on your phone to bring yourself back to the moment.  After you practice this for awhile, you’ll become much more aware of your current state.

I know it has made me more aware.  I catch myself now when I’ve drifted off into other realities and I use conscious breathing to bring myself back to the moment.

Another technique you might use when your hourly timer goes off is to find an object and focus on it for a few moments.  Really look at the object.  It could be something on your desk, out the window or across the room.  Observe the object’s shape, color and lighting.  Think about how it came into existence.  Appreciate its beauty.  Really see it.  This will also bring you back to the moment.

You can even combine these two techniques.  Breathe consciously for a few breaths and then fully observe an object.  This can really give you a sense of peace and focus your mind back on the moment.  In all, it will only take you 2 to 3 minutes.

Living in the Present Is Rewarding

Really making ourselves aware of the present and drinking in deeply all it has to offer is a better way of life.  It certainly is an improvement compared to hurrying and rushing from one thing to the next without ever appreciating any of it.

Your food tastes better, your relationships improve and you are happier when you intentionally bring yourself back to the reality in which you are living.  Practice the techniques above and you’ll enjoy a richer, more vibrant life.

How do you keep yourself present in the moment?  I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Photo by Engle & Smith

Many of us, myself included, whiz through the day barely taking notice of what we are doing. 

We fail to be present in the moment.  We just hurry through our mental or written to-do list  until it is time to quit for the day.

The days go by.  The weeks go by.  The months go by and before we know it, we have hurried another year of our life away.  I think this is a terrible way to live.

I struggle with living in and enjoying the moment

Okay, there I’ve admitted it.  I have a problem being present in the moment and truly drinking in the satisfaction it has to offer.

My mind is usually preoccupied with what’s next.  I’m already pressing myself to get to the next thing or I’m worried and feeling guilty about how I’m wasting time not getting to the next thing. 

I often feel the thing I’m doing now is encroaching on the time I need to get the next thing done.  I’m usually in a hurry and sometimes it really is for no reason. 

Rushing for me is a habit.  I’m also addicted to efficiency.  Is it apparent yet that I want to get things done?  Again, it is so I can get to whatever is next.  I have to meet the demands of home, work, blogging, children and whatever else I can conjure up.

I can feel it right now.  I want to hurry up and finish this article.  I need to get it done so, I can get it published, so it will be ready for the artificial deadline I’ve set in my mind and so I can move on to get other things done.

Are you feeling it?  Do you want to hurry up and get to the point of this article so you can move on to the next thing?

Hurriedness is a disease that robs us of enjoyment in life

Is this a disease?!?  I’m pretty sure it is at least for me.

Wiktionary defines disease as:

An abnormal condition of the body or mind that causes discomfort or dysfunction; distinct from injury insofar as the latter is usually instantaneously acquired.

I’d say that my hurriedness and efficiency are abnormal.  This is not how we were intended to live.  It is dysfunctional.  It does not lead to the best life possible.

Hurrying and being ultra-efficient are often enemies to true enjoyment in life.  It creates stress and anxiety which are detrimental to my physical health.

I’d classify hurriedness as a cancer of life itself.  It is a disease that eats away at my life from the inside.  It destroys all that I’ve worked so hard to achieve because it steals the enjoyment and satisfaction from it.

I realize that hurrying through life is the wrong way to live

I’ve really began to see that I hurry too often.  I just do not take the time to savor what I’m doing.  I’m convinced that this is very detrimental to living life to the fullest.

As an example, I love to write, but I usually fail to take the time to delight in it.

We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection.
~ Anais Nin

I pressure myself to get it done instead of relishing in the process.  Why?!?

The crazy thing is that I do this to myself.  No one else is responsible for it.  I push myself to the point where I drain most of the enjoyment from everything!

Hurrying leaves me feeling empty and unfulfilled.  I get to the end of the day and I’m just  tired and stressed instead of satisfied for a job well done.

How I’ve decided to enjoy the present moment

I am beginning to understand that it is in these tiny moments that we truly milk the honey out of life.

Kiss your life.
Accept it, just as it is.
Today.
Now.
So that those moments of happiness
you’re waiting for don’t pass you by.
~Philip Bosman

Here is some of what I’m going to do to make sure the happiness in my life doesn’t pass me by.

• Slow down and be present in the moment
• Stop waiting for that one big success to come along to be happy
• Practice gratefulness for the small things that make life fun
• Focus my attention on things I enjoy doing
• Stop multi-tasking so often
• Really listen to people and engage them in conversation

Will this work?  I honestly don’t know.  I’ve been the way I am for so long, it is going to be a struggle, but I’ve committed myself to living more consciously and with less hurry.

What practical suggestions would you offer to help me?

Photo by nattu