The Five Most Common Barriers to a Passionate Life

This is a guest post from Dr. Paul Dyer.

Here’s a sad fact. The world is full of millions of unhappy people who are disillusioned with life. People who merely go through the motions each day but who can’t help wonder, “Isn’t there more to life than this?”

Well, the answer is unequivocally, “Yes!” And of course everyone wants to find meaning, purpose, energy, and passion in their lives. People want to get out of bed enthused about the prospects of the new day. But if you want a more passion-filled life, how do you do it?

There is no shortage of self-help advice on the web and in every local bookstore. I want to suggest to you, however, that while much of this information may be useful, you already possess all you need to begin living a passionate life today, right now, in this very moment.

The Secret to Living a Joyful Life

After working with thousands of people over the last 20 years, I’ve come to believe that the secret to living a joyful life begins by listening to what you already know. I’m not talking about thinking your way to a happier life. It is much more about listening than thinking.

By listening to that quiet inner voice, to your heart’s desires and dreams about how you are to spend your time and energy, you can receive traveling directions for your life journey. These traveling directions are your Calling.

Callings can be an encouragement to do a small thing with your time and energy or to pursue a radical reorganization of your life. Either way, these traveling directions already exist. Maybe you know what it is that’s tugging at your heart or maybe it’s buried in your subconscious. But in both cases the directions are there. So, if everyone deeply desires to live a life of energy, purpose, and passion, and if these traveling directions are already present, why is it that so many people are disconnected from the kind of fulfilling life I’ve been talking about?

I call them barriers, the things that get in between our Calling and our taking the kind of action that will lead us toward more passionate life.

While every person’s situation is unique, here are the five most common barriers that get in the way of following a Calling. While much more can be said about each of these issues, here are a few ideas about to how to overcome these obstacles.

1.  I’m Not Good Enough for My Calling

If there is a Calling, then there is One who Calls. And regardless of your faith perspective, it makes sense that the One who Calls has given you the gifts and talents you will need to succeed in response to your Call. You may need further preparation, such as schooling, you will certainly need the help of others, but you definitely have the core of what you will need to fulfill your Call.

2.  My Calling is Impractical

What is more impractical than living a life that is not rewarding? Your time is limited, you will not live forever, so making it count for others and for yourself is one of the most practical things you can do.

3.  Others Won’t Understand if I Respond to My Calling

So how important is this issue to you? If it’s your neighbor down the street who you see once a year at the holiday party, so what! If it’s your old high school chums who have fancy business cards to hand out at the reunion, let me assure you that my many years of working with individuals in pain suggest that their business cards are sometimes serving as their own barriers to following their Calling.

You may indeed need to bring the people who love you, those who truly care about you, along in your process. You will almost always find that they are much more understanding, perhaps even relieved, than you think they will be. Because they care about you, they’re often delighted that you will finally do what you’re being led to do with your life.

At the end of the day, when it comes to what others think about your actions, you will have to decide, what is it that really matters to you. Sometime these are truly tough choices. But remember that not deciding is also a choice.

4.  I Would Follow My Calling, But I Have Financial Obligations

This may be the most common barrier that men express when they know they’d like to be living a different life, but they just can’t bring themselves to do it. I’m not suggesting that this is an easy situation; it’s not.

First and foremost, ask yourself if it’s real. Is this really the issue or are you more concerned with status, prestige, or perceived security than you are willing to surrender to your Calling? Second, ask yourself, “What it is that I truly value?” “Who is it that I want to be?” “What is it that you want to experience in life?” And finally, if you want a different kind of life, ask “How will I take a small step today that will lead me toward where I really want to be tomorrow?” Maybe you need to pay off some debt, have a conversation with someone, or learn to accept the reality of what you really care about.

5.  I Don’t Know What My Calling Is

Well this can come in a flash or take a good amount of time. However, if you’re willing to put in the effort, if you’re willing to listen for the traveling directions that are already in your subconscious, you can learn about your Calling. I would suggest that you take the Begin Your Journey Assessment to begin to explore where you currently are on your journey and then commit to being open to doing the work necessary to understand who you are and what you’re being asked to do.

Here’s the bottom line: Those who come to understand their Calling, and then surrender to its leading, live happier and more fulfilled lives than those who don’t. I hope you’ll take the challenge and find incredible joy in the process.

This has been a guest post from Dr. Paul Dyer. Author, teacher, coach, and consultant, Dr. Dyer has worked with thousands of people as they’ve sought to clarify their values, change their behavior and reach their goals. If you haven’t had a chance already, make sure you follow Paul on Twitter or subscribe to his RSS feed to get his blog updates.

Photo by SD Dirk