Top 7 Traits of Interesting and Engaging People
Do you want your ideas to be heard?
I know I do and I bet you do too. Deep inside, we all want our opinions to matter. The first step in engaging someone’s attention is to actually be interesting.
We often fall into the trap of believing that people should listen just because we are speaking. This usually doesn’t work out for us.
It isn’t that people are rude, it is just that they are busy with a lot of other things competing for their attention. Being interesting helps to break through the noise.
Develop these traits to get the attention of those that matter
Fortunately, there are things we can do to make ourselves more interesting. It takes a little practice, but it is worth it to get our ideas heard.
Develop a reputation for being interesting and people will stop what they are doing and listen to you intently every time.
Continue ignoring this advice and you’ll get the same results you get today.
Here are some things that you can do to become more interesting:
1. Hold a unique perspective
Be the one that has a slightly different and insightful perspective on the things that matter to you. People listen to those that help open their minds to new ways of seeing the world.
A great example of this is Jerry Seinfeld. Seinfeld’s humor often involved every day items and experiences, but he put an odd spin on it. This made people want to listen. They were curious about what he would say next.
One word of warning, you can take this too far. You don’t want people to think you are crazy. Your perspective needs to be unique, but not wacky. Be sure to tailor your message to the audience and situation to maximize your effectiveness.
2. Have broad horizons
A small mind leads to boring conversation. Educate yourself on a wide-range of topics. Read, travel and talk to people of all backgrounds to gain interesting insights.
Develop your own opinions on a wide array of topics, but be open to learning new angles too. A part of becoming interesting is listening and learning from other engaging people.
Will Rogers was an Okie that on the surface seemed very simple, but he had traveled around the world three times, made 71 movies and wrote more than 4,000 newspaper columns. I bet he was interesting!
3. Don’t just talk about yourself and your experiences
Share what you have to say, but don’t dwell too long on your views. Turn the conversation around by asking an open-ended question to engage your partner.
People are more interested in what you have to say when you take an interest in their opinions as well. Don’t just talk about yourself!
4. Be curious about everything
This goes along with having broad horizons. Remember Curious George? He was a little monkey that explored his world to its full extent. Sometimes this got George into a little mischief, but he also learned a lot from his adventures.
The more you know, the more you grow! The deeper a well of knowledge and information you have to draw upon, the more interesting you will become.
5. Try to truly understand and empathize with others
Stephen Covey tells us to “Seek first to understand”. This is good advice. Be sure you fully comprehend all aspects of a situation before you offer your opinion about it.
We often go off half-cocked. We think we know the full picture and begin spewing forth our advice before we’ve listened thoroughly. Verify that you understand clearly before you start talking. This will keep your ideas from being dismissed.
6. Inject a little humor
Clever humor that lightens a conversation can help to relax and engage people. Of course, you have to know when, where and how to add humor properly. Otherwise, it can create an awkward moment that may lose your audience.
Smiling is also a great way to non-verbally relay positive emotion to others. It makes people feel good when you smile at them and this leads to more attentive listening.
7. Be enthusiastic and passionate
Every topic is more interesting when the speaker is brimming with enthusiasm and passion. We are automatically drawn into situations where we hear a lot of emotion in the voice of the communicator.
Put your whole heart into what you are saying. Of course, your enthusiasm has to be authentic or you will be immediately dismissed. This is why we discount a lot of sales pitches because we can tell the hype is phony.
Sincere enthusiasm and passion will engage people every time.
Be interesting and people will listen!
People like to listen and talk to us when we make the effort to be interesting. Like so many things in life, we have to work at being an effective communicator. Try developing these traits and you will see the results for yourself!
What do you do to make yourself interesting?
Photo by lanuiop
Those are great traits and anyone who possesses those will certainly be an interesting person. I really believe that #5 is so important. People like people who make an effort to understand them, to be engaged in their lives.
Positively Present´s last blog ..happiness doesn’t just happen
@Positively – People are certainly more interested in us when we take an earnest interest in them. It is just human nature. What is the old saying? Something like – “You have to be a friend to get a friend.”
Good to hear from you!
The #5 was really best said by Søren Kierkegaard back in 1859:
“If One Is Truly to Succeed in Leading a Person to a Specific Place, One Must First and Foremost Take Care to Find Him Where He is and Begin There.
This is the secret in the entire art of helping.
Anyone who cannot do this is himself under a delusion if he thinks he is able to help someone else. In order truly to help someone else, I must understand more than he–but certainly first and foremost understand what he understands.
If I do not do that, then my greater understanding does not help him at all. If I nevertheless want to assert my greater understanding, then it is because I am vain or proud, then basically instead of benefiting him I really want to be admired by him.
But all true helping begins with a humbling.
The helper must first humble himself under the person he wants to help and thereby understand that to help is not to dominate but to serve, that to help is a not to be the most dominating but the most patient, that to help is a willingness for the time being to put up with being in the wrong and not understanding what the other understands.”
/Thomas